I hate food

The priest is silent for a moment, and then says "Go home and cut seven lemons in half. Squeeze the juice into a glass and drink it down in one gulp. "And I'll be forgiven?" asks the man. "No," replies the priest, "but it will wipe that fucking smirk off your face!"

Still to this day they both think, it's a terrible name...

First of all, of course, he wants to visit the holy places. He stops a taxi, sits inside, and realizes he forgot how to say "The Western Wall" in Hebrew. He thinks for a moment: "Driver.. take me to the place... where you Jews are all crying." The driver took him to the Tax Authority HQ.

She took him by the hand, looked him in the eye and passionately told him, "You did not come here to die!". He replied "Nah mate, I just got here yesterdie".

I told her to go date rocks

A Hiking.

An Edo-phile.

Because last time he made them feel-awful (falafel)

A little on the Dark Side. Wel dun, dun dudun dun dudun.

She asks the owner, “Why is this parrot only a dollar?” The owner sighs, “Well… he used to live in a brothel, so his language is a little colorful.” The woman, amused, buys him anyway and takes him home. As soon as she walks through the door, the parrot looks around and says, “New house, new madam. Nice!” Then her two daughters walk in. The parrot squawks, “New girls! Busy night ahead!” Then her husband walks in. The parrot pauses, tilts his head, and says, “Well well well… welcome back, Dave.”